The Spoon: A lesson on how consultants can make a difference in an organization.






Last week, we took some friends to a new Indian restaurant, 'Muthu's Place,' and noticed that the Indian waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I observed that he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around and saw that all the Indian staff had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter came back to serve our soup I inquired, 'Why the spoon?'





'Well, 'he explained, 'the restaurant's owner hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all of our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.'





As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he replaced it with his spare. 'I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now..' I was impressed.





I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the Indian waiter's fly.





Looking around, I saw that all of the Indian waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So, before he walked off, I asked the waiter, 'Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?'





'Oh, certainly!' Then the Indian waiter lowered his voice. 'Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also learned that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of our you-know-what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39%.'





I asked quietly, 'After you get it out, how do you put it back?'





'Well,' he whispered, 'I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon.'

Subject: I sick...no come to work








Hung Chow calls into work and says, "Hey boss, I no come work today, I really sick. Got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come work".





The boss says, "You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel sick like you do, I go to my wife and tell her to give me Sex. That makes everything better and I go to work. You try that."



Two hours later Hung Chow calls again.





"I do what you say boss and I feel great. I be at work soon.........You got nice house!"

EXERCISE FOR PEOPLE OVER 50




Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side.



With a 5-lb potato bag in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, and then relax.



Each day you'll find that you can hold this position for just a bit longer. After a couple of weeks, move up to 10-lb potato bags.



Then try 50-lb potato bags and then eventually try to get to where you can lift a 100-lb potato bag in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute. (I'm at this level.)



After you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each bag.